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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:13AM by NERPG https://ift.tt/DpfsbYM
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:13AM by NERPG https://ift.tt/DpfsbYM
Every station is a space station, technically.
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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:18AM by TheMysteryMan_iii https://ift.tt/DiUdeBG
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:18AM by TheMysteryMan_iii https://ift.tt/DiUdeBG
Women want to feel wanted, men want to feel needed
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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:26AM by Zealousideal_Ad_1604 https://ift.tt/hF043b9
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:26AM by Zealousideal_Ad_1604 https://ift.tt/hF043b9
Sometimes mold can look like ice cream.
Don't know why it just can.
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:36AM by RamenChan227 https://ift.tt/D7BiHtP
20% of people have licked their own mums vaginas. a fith of babies are born with their tongues out.
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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:43AM by maccer20 https://ift.tt/1mcIrBJ
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 02:43AM by maccer20 https://ift.tt/1mcIrBJ
A household that shares the same toothpaste COVIDs together.
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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 01:36AM by techsupport261 https://ift.tt/gL0yxn9
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 01:36AM by techsupport261 https://ift.tt/gL0yxn9
Recording things for austerity is for when we can no longer afford streaming services.
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Submitted August 01, 2022 at 12:46AM by pikknz https://ift.tt/840cMNi
Submitted August 01, 2022 at 12:46AM by pikknz https://ift.tt/840cMNi
Water guns are simultaneously semi-automatic and burst fire.
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Submitted July 31, 2022 at 03:45AM by gtavthrowaway13860 https://ift.tt/ksmPNJB
Submitted July 31, 2022 at 03:45AM by gtavthrowaway13860 https://ift.tt/ksmPNJB
The key to being highly regarded as a communicator is to be just as articulate as you need to be as far as each individual recipient of that communication is concerned
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Submitted July 31, 2022 at 02:49AM by Dogalicious https://ift.tt/8dKolbF
Submitted July 31, 2022 at 02:49AM by Dogalicious https://ift.tt/8dKolbF
More incentive to never commit a major crime is not having to fill out a bunch of pre-employment forms and having to awkwardly explain hits on a background check.
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Submitted July 31, 2022 at 01:48AM by MomsLeftNut011 https://ift.tt/S1ltOJb
Submitted July 31, 2022 at 01:48AM by MomsLeftNut011 https://ift.tt/S1ltOJb
There’s a very high chance that someone you know personally, or have been acquainted with, has raped somebody
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Submitted July 31, 2022 at 12:50AM by Renegade257 https://ift.tt/ekJLpsQ
Submitted July 31, 2022 at 12:50AM by Renegade257 https://ift.tt/ekJLpsQ
The ocean is slightly caffeinated by garbage from coffee and tea
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Submitted July 31, 2022 at 12:50AM by DoodDoes https://ift.tt/3cvrnju
Submitted July 31, 2022 at 12:50AM by DoodDoes https://ift.tt/3cvrnju
When you ask for a styrofoam cup, you’re technically asking for a cup that doesn’t exist.
Styrofoam is the brand, and doesn’t make cups, and also not even what we call styrofoam usually
Submitted July 30, 2022 at 02:49AM by ImVisibility https://ift.tt/YREMsT3
The big bang was like the splash of a rock falling into water.
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Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:47AM by mouse_8b https://ift.tt/KVNMrqI
Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:47AM by mouse_8b https://ift.tt/KVNMrqI
Minions have been around since the dinosaurs and are still depicted as children in the present, so technically speaking, Minions are Lolis.
P.S. I hated every second of typing that.
Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:47AM by Brad45776 https://ift.tt/fKLIeq8
All the F-22s must have been killed since we see Starscream later on in the Battle of Mission City.
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Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:49AM by SparkMyke https://ift.tt/rn4t7oG
Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:49AM by SparkMyke https://ift.tt/rn4t7oG
you will be less sure that you possess an uncommon sense than that you are missing a common one
You might experience something no one else does and you will think they just don't comment on the regular thing, but if you can't see or hear well you will learn from context that others do it better.
Submitted July 30, 2022 at 01:50AM by RnDanger https://ift.tt/kjbpm7G
Most everyone believes in evolution, but people disagree on the context in which it applies.
There are those on the left, who acknowledge its applicability in biology, but disavow it in economics. Those on the right tend to see the applicability in economics, but not in biology.
Submitted July 29, 2022 at 04:34AM by ihbarddx https://ift.tt/17Wf9aN
The bigger the circle of the known, the larger the contact with the unknown
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Submitted July 29, 2022 at 03:49AM by Skelligean https://ift.tt/Tjr1Gvc
Submitted July 29, 2022 at 03:49AM by Skelligean https://ift.tt/Tjr1Gvc
Until cameras and video were invented…
No one knew what they looked like with their eyes closed.
Submitted July 29, 2022 at 02:47AM by TheDoc5789 https://ift.tt/f09iam5
Famous bass lines in songs are often not that difficult, it's just they can be clearly heard on regular speakers
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Submitted July 29, 2022 at 01:48AM by dukerustfield https://ift.tt/OPD3Ahy
Submitted July 29, 2022 at 01:48AM by dukerustfield https://ift.tt/OPD3Ahy
Eyes wide shut parties during the last few years must’ve really been hard on the face
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Submitted July 29, 2022 at 12:45AM by TIFUstorytime https://ift.tt/JN8f7jL
Submitted July 29, 2022 at 12:45AM by TIFUstorytime https://ift.tt/JN8f7jL
Zombie movie characters have never seen a zombie movie
I dont know how people in zombie movies have never seen a zombie movie before and waste all their ammo on the body and not the head. I think Shaun of the Dead was the smartest zombie movie because they figured it out and it was fun for everyone.
Submitted July 28, 2022 at 04:49AM by boomgoon https://ift.tt/Y7Gae4x
Sushi rolls are the same shape coming as they are going out.
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Submitted July 28, 2022 at 03:49AM by Ridethepig101 https://ift.tt/fBD3y45
Submitted July 28, 2022 at 03:49AM by Ridethepig101 https://ift.tt/fBD3y45
Tall people have probably spent more money and replacing/fixing phones.
That is all.
Submitted July 28, 2022 at 02:48AM by PotatoAim1805 https://ift.tt/Kjw1iPg
Deaf people are the only ones who can hear each other properly at a rock concert.
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Submitted July 28, 2022 at 01:49AM by wils_152 https://ift.tt/amNyS10
Submitted July 28, 2022 at 01:49AM by wils_152 https://ift.tt/amNyS10
More like propaganda superhighway
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Submitted July 28, 2022 at 12:36AM by applesaucr https://ift.tt/YAvQpnF
Submitted July 28, 2022 at 12:36AM by applesaucr https://ift.tt/YAvQpnF
Electricity companies vibrate your electrons for you in return for coin.
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 02:49AM by Diseased-Jackass https://ift.tt/CUt56Xl
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 02:49AM by Diseased-Jackass https://ift.tt/CUt56Xl
The one thing that is off limits when describing wine is saying it tastes like grapes.
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 01:44AM by worldsbesttaco https://ift.tt/2w08AHE
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 01:44AM by worldsbesttaco https://ift.tt/2w08AHE
Cell phones have made laughing by yourself in public seem normal
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:22AM by zztop610 https://ift.tt/v9OrXDq
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:22AM by zztop610 https://ift.tt/v9OrXDq
Humans are the only species that plan on dying
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:28AM by TyneeTrumpHands https://ift.tt/7YQtEa4
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:28AM by TyneeTrumpHands https://ift.tt/7YQtEa4
Crazy train and sweet dreams Maine riff are very similar
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:40AM by ross-um88 https://ift.tt/M9wPDFs
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:40AM by ross-um88 https://ift.tt/M9wPDFs
The nostalgic smell of our grandparents' clothing shows how much worse modern laundry products are
The smell of modern laundry products fades within a few days or weeks, but the smell of the vintage laundry products is still there after multiple decades.
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:42AM by MichalNemecek https://ift.tt/PBr57iR
Once humans unlock the power of living forever, jails will no longer be of use
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Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:49AM by Spaghetti-Laptop https://ift.tt/iEZwxad
Submitted July 27, 2022 at 12:49AM by Spaghetti-Laptop https://ift.tt/iEZwxad
Our ability to find things (wild animals) cute has probably done more harm than good
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Submitted July 26, 2022 at 03:22AM by Angeryreact https://ift.tt/suHt9L4
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 03:22AM by Angeryreact https://ift.tt/suHt9L4
Misinformation who does it better¿
Misinformation had nothing over HG Wells radio show war of the worlds
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 03:38AM by WEEEBBER9999 https://ift.tt/2yjEeIr
Everyone Technically looks the same at one point
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Submitted July 26, 2022 at 03:39AM by NobleDictator https://ift.tt/FQMhgUH
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 03:39AM by NobleDictator https://ift.tt/FQMhgUH
Milk is classified as either a food or a drink depending on your age
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Submitted July 26, 2022 at 02:50AM by anhonestassman https://ift.tt/5ywJnSm
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 02:50AM by anhonestassman https://ift.tt/5ywJnSm
When someone says they turned 180°, they really turned 360°.
When an angle is 180°, the line keeps going straight. When an angle is 360°, it goes back onto itself.
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 01:33AM by Ramenoodlez1 https://ift.tt/KMmiw8A
The most popular cat breed in the world is also the most common stray.
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Submitted July 26, 2022 at 12:45AM by Capta1nzomb1e https://ift.tt/TdBUkP4
Submitted July 26, 2022 at 12:45AM by Capta1nzomb1e https://ift.tt/TdBUkP4
A twin can be born at the same moment as someone else, but never their own twin.
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Submitted July 25, 2022 at 03:47AM by FictionVent https://ift.tt/Yk0Oa2b
Submitted July 25, 2022 at 03:47AM by FictionVent https://ift.tt/Yk0Oa2b
As a pessimist, you can only win. Either something good happens or you are right
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Submitted July 25, 2022 at 03:50AM by Famufurito https://ift.tt/aS9M2GR
Submitted July 25, 2022 at 03:50AM by Famufurito https://ift.tt/aS9M2GR
Domestic dogs/cats who are treated well arguably live better lives than most humans.
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Submitted July 25, 2022 at 02:50AM by Wrathofserenity https://ift.tt/c9qQF2y
Submitted July 25, 2022 at 02:50AM by Wrathofserenity https://ift.tt/c9qQF2y
The knights order of malta is technically the smallest country, but it doesn't actually own any land.
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Submitted July 25, 2022 at 01:49AM by mako0804 https://ift.tt/cvVMrL7
Submitted July 25, 2022 at 01:49AM by mako0804 https://ift.tt/cvVMrL7
Sponge Bobs shape suggests he’s a synthetic sponge rather than a natural one
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Submitted July 25, 2022 at 12:37AM by BackgroundSide4461 https://ift.tt/xZNUOgB
Submitted July 25, 2022 at 12:37AM by BackgroundSide4461 https://ift.tt/xZNUOgB
Most people who reference something they read recently are talking about a headline.
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Submitted July 24, 2022 at 04:41AM by BigSexyCommentary https://ift.tt/hKzM4uI
Submitted July 24, 2022 at 04:41AM by BigSexyCommentary https://ift.tt/hKzM4uI
People are often grossed out by other people’s bodily fluids, but tears are also a bodily fluid that most people won’t hesitate to touch
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Submitted July 24, 2022 at 03:46AM by sandalcade https://ift.tt/O2jVNn8
Submitted July 24, 2022 at 03:46AM by sandalcade https://ift.tt/O2jVNn8
When you ask someone about their favorite music genre, almost no one says disco.
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Submitted July 24, 2022 at 02:48AM by Reblecksers https://ift.tt/SwhBz1l
Submitted July 24, 2022 at 02:48AM by Reblecksers https://ift.tt/SwhBz1l
An elevator/lift only covers half of its functionality.
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Submitted July 24, 2022 at 01:44AM by liarandathief https://ift.tt/r7vtgiB
Submitted July 24, 2022 at 01:44AM by liarandathief https://ift.tt/r7vtgiB
during a solar eclipse the dark side of moon is no longer dark
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Submitted July 24, 2022 at 12:50AM by Cold_Rock123 https://ift.tt/nMEsDC4
Submitted July 24, 2022 at 12:50AM by Cold_Rock123 https://ift.tt/nMEsDC4
Every astronaut that visits the ISS has inadvertently drank every other visiting astronauts piss
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:29AM by murderedcats https://ift.tt/pX2LjYE
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:29AM by murderedcats https://ift.tt/pX2LjYE
Being a guest on someone’s boat and you try to help makes you feel useless
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:33AM by keelchris20 https://ift.tt/KPMnJlv
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:33AM by keelchris20 https://ift.tt/KPMnJlv
People who died of old age died because of not dying
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:38AM by Mikubestgirl_ https://ift.tt/61bKwWO
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 03:38AM by Mikubestgirl_ https://ift.tt/61bKwWO
You can probably learn a lot about a man's character by looking through his porn collection.
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 02:47AM by Ser_Hans https://ift.tt/mN8hzjx
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 02:47AM by Ser_Hans https://ift.tt/mN8hzjx
Starfish can't not point and strare.
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 01:40AM by HypnoSnurtle https://ift.tt/BxK8Eru
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 01:40AM by HypnoSnurtle https://ift.tt/BxK8Eru
Kangaroos look like they have serious back pain.
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Submitted July 23, 2022 at 12:49AM by Haaaaaaaa_ https://ift.tt/o2Md9LU
Submitted July 23, 2022 at 12:49AM by Haaaaaaaa_ https://ift.tt/o2Md9LU
You've probably been in so many photos or videos accidentally
There's bound to have been a shit ton of times where you walked past while someone was taking a photo or video and they took it at the time you were walking by
Submitted July 22, 2022 at 04:49AM by dylan103906 https://ift.tt/HCONAET
When you ride a bicycle no handed you're steering with your ass
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Submitted July 22, 2022 at 02:36AM by Daymo741 https://ift.tt/ogjHbln
Submitted July 22, 2022 at 02:36AM by Daymo741 https://ift.tt/ogjHbln
Growing your hair out is one of the cheapest, easiest, and reversible ways to find out who thinks their opinion matters.
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Submitted July 22, 2022 at 01:46AM by SoDakZak https://ift.tt/MQ1T2EB
Submitted July 22, 2022 at 01:46AM by SoDakZak https://ift.tt/MQ1T2EB
The fact that women's sense of smell is significantly better than men's is a troubling thought for any man trying to covertly sneak a fart out on a date... you can never be certain that you've won the gamble.
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Submitted July 22, 2022 at 12:43AM by God_Hand_9764 https://ift.tt/ewpUG2I
Submitted July 22, 2022 at 12:43AM by God_Hand_9764 https://ift.tt/ewpUG2I
Kangaroos aren't particularly famous for dropping off take aways and those humans who do that are not particularly known for jumping all the way to your house.
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Submitted July 21, 2022 at 03:33AM by AlfredNotSoGreat https://ift.tt/1scahFX
Submitted July 21, 2022 at 03:33AM by AlfredNotSoGreat https://ift.tt/1scahFX
Wind is caused by temperature differentials which are largely fueled by the sun. Wind energy is mostly solar energy.
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Submitted July 21, 2022 at 03:43AM by Brainsonastick https://ift.tt/8pC2WBt
Submitted July 21, 2022 at 03:43AM by Brainsonastick https://ift.tt/8pC2WBt
Our survival depends on being airtight and watertight at the right times
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Submitted July 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by Sci_Insist1 https://ift.tt/dQRxFJg
Submitted July 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by Sci_Insist1 https://ift.tt/dQRxFJg
Procrastination = giving yourself the reward before you've completed the task.
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Submitted July 21, 2022 at 12:48AM by Snoo-35252 https://ift.tt/BGirvon
Submitted July 21, 2022 at 12:48AM by Snoo-35252 https://ift.tt/BGirvon
Parenthood is tidying one part of the house so that you're more prepared to tidy the next part of the house.
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 02:48AM by incredibleinkpen https://ift.tt/jqJxWNH
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 02:48AM by incredibleinkpen https://ift.tt/jqJxWNH
All biological mothers are bodybuilders.
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 01:49AM by mistabnanas https://ift.tt/nfF4m6H
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 01:49AM by mistabnanas https://ift.tt/nfF4m6H
World's first man was probably the hairiest one
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:30AM by TridenTrim https://ift.tt/BKqvt0b
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:30AM by TridenTrim https://ift.tt/BKqvt0b
The people who ran the Salem with trials were probably witches themselves, trying to not arouse suspicion
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:36AM by wisplike https://ift.tt/obf0NZk
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:36AM by wisplike https://ift.tt/obf0NZk
There's an unsettling high chance that one of your ancestors killed on a regular basis
Hardship, disputes, crimes or even simply wars might have pushed at least one of your ancestors to murder quite regularly, meaning we might be a descendant of a killer
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:44AM by Saborius https://ift.tt/RxMDtmS
People complain if you wear dark clothes in summer but not if you wear white clothes during winter
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:47AM by Rocasolida https://ift.tt/wriClG6
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:47AM by Rocasolida https://ift.tt/wriClG6
Fire, including from the sun and stars, is the only source of natural light.
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Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:49AM by BellyScratchFTW https://ift.tt/nlhJfK7
Submitted July 20, 2022 at 12:49AM by BellyScratchFTW https://ift.tt/nlhJfK7
As a child you probably were the most carefree but also cried the most
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 01:58AM by LordRestillence https://ift.tt/J0VcMCx
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 01:58AM by LordRestillence https://ift.tt/J0VcMCx
So many dads were last seen on their way to the milk aisle, yet we don't see their pictures on milk cartons.
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:08AM by Silly-Ass_Goose https://ift.tt/fDY0d32
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:08AM by Silly-Ass_Goose https://ift.tt/fDY0d32
A guy actually got a Nobel prize for solving why you headphones get tangled in your pocket.
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:26AM by Slayerx270 https://ift.tt/poPfcVz
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:26AM by Slayerx270 https://ift.tt/poPfcVz
English Bitter type of beer is not bitter in the slightest
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:38AM by UnsaidRnD https://ift.tt/NGZ967W
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:38AM by UnsaidRnD https://ift.tt/NGZ967W
We just judge how good our sleep was based on how good it felt to wake up. That doesn't necessarily correlate to how much sleep you got though
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:42AM by Gladiolus_00 https://ift.tt/hXbGvdq
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 02:42AM by Gladiolus_00 https://ift.tt/hXbGvdq
Natural selection is a very slow A-B test.
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Submitted July 19, 2022 at 12:38AM by thesmartass1 https://ift.tt/CJeHFEo
Submitted July 19, 2022 at 12:38AM by thesmartass1 https://ift.tt/CJeHFEo
To a mermaid living in water, peeing liquid in the ocean next to them is the same as someone farting gas in the same air filled room as us. Both force everyone else to have to breathe in the shame
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:25AM by YobaiYamete https://ift.tt/lFEM8mB
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:25AM by YobaiYamete https://ift.tt/lFEM8mB
In the movie Rocky 1, sparring with the meat of dead animals is actually punching down.
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:42AM by Silly-Ass_Goose https://ift.tt/Hk3frGR
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:42AM by Silly-Ass_Goose https://ift.tt/Hk3frGR
Eyelashes are special pieces of hair
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:46AM by curiouslyweakmints https://ift.tt/Yuafqyw
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:46AM by curiouslyweakmints https://ift.tt/Yuafqyw
The day Joe Rogan passes away, many won't believe the news, especially those who have been joking for years.
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:46AM by Cbmj3423 https://ift.tt/J6TZDhq
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 02:46AM by Cbmj3423 https://ift.tt/J6TZDhq
When brittish sing, their accent reduces significantly
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 01:47AM by Kolos182 https://ift.tt/iRvSU0o
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 01:47AM by Kolos182 https://ift.tt/iRvSU0o
Someone saying they will be ready in ‘one second’ often takes longer than someone saying they will be ready in ‘two seconds’
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Submitted July 18, 2022 at 12:50AM by biscuitmixer https://ift.tt/XS9vZxL
Submitted July 18, 2022 at 12:50AM by biscuitmixer https://ift.tt/XS9vZxL
Lotteries are inverted taxes — Richer people pay more taxes for the money to be redistributed to poor people. Then poor people buy lottery tickets and redistribute the money back making rich people
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Submitted July 17, 2022 at 03:27AM by daniel-sousa-me https://ift.tt/PGtiJe6
Submitted July 17, 2022 at 03:27AM by daniel-sousa-me https://ift.tt/PGtiJe6
With our small ears that look folded back. And the habit of showing warm and affection by bearing our teeth (smile). In the mammal kingdom, Humans are probably considered one of the most aggressive and hostile looking animal.
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Submitted July 17, 2022 at 03:49AM by OscarOzzieOzborne https://ift.tt/KC35Pzq
Submitted July 17, 2022 at 03:49AM by OscarOzzieOzborne https://ift.tt/KC35Pzq
You can really tell what a generation was going through by listening to their music
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Submitted July 17, 2022 at 02:45AM by PacmanTheHitman https://ift.tt/UmtMla0
Submitted July 17, 2022 at 02:45AM by PacmanTheHitman https://ift.tt/UmtMla0
Society has become so fake that the truth actually bothers people.
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Submitted July 17, 2022 at 12:47AM by Zombie_Be_Gone https://ift.tt/qCyoi9j
Submitted July 17, 2022 at 12:47AM by Zombie_Be_Gone https://ift.tt/qCyoi9j
School made us learn to use word processing software. Most jobs are more geared toward spreadsheet software.
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Submitted July 16, 2022 at 04:47AM by JackMcKracken https://ift.tt/ZlGib4Q
Submitted July 16, 2022 at 04:47AM by JackMcKracken https://ift.tt/ZlGib4Q
Learning to lucid dream is learning to control your thoughts while unconscious
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Submitted July 16, 2022 at 03:46AM by guytheguy1234 https://ift.tt/kgjoOJr
Submitted July 16, 2022 at 03:46AM by guytheguy1234 https://ift.tt/kgjoOJr
The waste that was generated in the hospital on the day you were born is still just sitting there in the landfill...
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Submitted July 16, 2022 at 02:40AM by Dreamsong_Druid https://ift.tt/rEGfuo1
Submitted July 16, 2022 at 02:40AM by Dreamsong_Druid https://ift.tt/rEGfuo1
Most shoes are also designed for feet without toes
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Submitted July 16, 2022 at 01:47AM by natureextraordinare https://ift.tt/4fuF6DM
Submitted July 16, 2022 at 01:47AM by natureextraordinare https://ift.tt/4fuF6DM
A platypus has both eggs and milk so maybe if you shake one hard enough you can make custard.
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Submitted July 16, 2022 at 12:46AM by whatsupbananashirt https://ift.tt/j5Z7qzo
Submitted July 16, 2022 at 12:46AM by whatsupbananashirt https://ift.tt/j5Z7qzo
23andMe sounds more like a porn site than one for finding family
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Submitted July 15, 2022 at 03:46AM by Robotic-Chomo https://ift.tt/UBcuIgo
Submitted July 15, 2022 at 03:46AM by Robotic-Chomo https://ift.tt/UBcuIgo
Online dating apps are allowing humanity to use selective breeding on itself the way it did with dogs
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Submitted July 15, 2022 at 03:47AM by TechnoGamer16 https://ift.tt/kgD7nI3
Submitted July 15, 2022 at 03:47AM by TechnoGamer16 https://ift.tt/kgD7nI3
It’s a brave person who uses a Weedwhacker while wearing shorts.
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Submitted July 15, 2022 at 02:41AM by Bempet583 https://ift.tt/mE4H3A8
Submitted July 15, 2022 at 02:41AM by Bempet583 https://ift.tt/mE4H3A8
Coffee is kind of like the spice melange: it is only found on one planet, it is everywhere on that planet, pilots use it as a navigation aid, it increases mental accuity
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Submitted July 15, 2022 at 01:48AM by Briewheel https://ift.tt/RyI5a9p
Submitted July 15, 2022 at 01:48AM by Briewheel https://ift.tt/RyI5a9p
Movie characters only need to hear an address or a phone number once to memorize them.
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Submitted July 15, 2022 at 12:48AM by mxosborn https://ift.tt/b4qxaZ5
Submitted July 15, 2022 at 12:48AM by mxosborn https://ift.tt/b4qxaZ5
A funeral director still goes to work when they die
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Submitted July 14, 2022 at 02:45AM by roodeeMental https://ift.tt/R1gHQLO
Submitted July 14, 2022 at 02:45AM by roodeeMental https://ift.tt/R1gHQLO
Kate McKinnon can impersonate almost anyone, but it's hard to do a good impression of Kate McKinnon
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Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:23AM by Hopeful_Wallaby3755 https://ift.tt/jMNoytG
Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:23AM by Hopeful_Wallaby3755 https://ift.tt/jMNoytG
Throughout all dreams, only pissing comes true
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Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:35AM by Dear-Transition6669 https://ift.tt/JZEsywp
Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:35AM by Dear-Transition6669 https://ift.tt/JZEsywp
Darkness travels at the speed of light.
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Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:36AM by SuspectFantastic7066 https://ift.tt/kKbeRfv
Submitted July 14, 2022 at 01:36AM by SuspectFantastic7066 https://ift.tt/kKbeRfv
Mars be destroyed by us faster than humans destroyed Earth
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Submitted July 14, 2022 at 12:39AM by EveryNightCarry https://ift.tt/4ncjPIb
Submitted July 14, 2022 at 12:39AM by EveryNightCarry https://ift.tt/4ncjPIb
James Webb telescope is the most expensive wallpaper generator in the world
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Submitted July 13, 2022 at 04:36AM by jMajuscule https://ift.tt/nmKfUCG
Submitted July 13, 2022 at 04:36AM by jMajuscule https://ift.tt/nmKfUCG
In a few decades, the legend of Technoblade will become a challenge for teens and maybe become a horror movie
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Submitted July 13, 2022 at 03:39AM by SpiritWolf1273 https://ift.tt/43F2R8w
Submitted July 13, 2022 at 03:39AM by SpiritWolf1273 https://ift.tt/43F2R8w
We build homes for criminals but not the homeless
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Submitted July 13, 2022 at 02:49AM by moneybot13 https://ift.tt/aZR4Bne
Submitted July 13, 2022 at 02:49AM by moneybot13 https://ift.tt/aZR4Bne
The healthier you are, the more likely it seems you'll die of unnatural causes
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Submitted July 13, 2022 at 01:46AM by eveningsand https://ift.tt/lL8HIEd
Submitted July 13, 2022 at 01:46AM by eveningsand https://ift.tt/lL8HIEd
Pilates is female calisthenics
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Submitted July 13, 2022 at 12:45AM by tiredginseng https://ift.tt/1dsgFP0
Submitted July 13, 2022 at 12:45AM by tiredginseng https://ift.tt/1dsgFP0
Schrodinger was probably a horrible pet owner.
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Submitted July 12, 2022 at 03:50AM by BillyBrimstoned https://ift.tt/HMgBQZ5
Submitted July 12, 2022 at 03:50AM by BillyBrimstoned https://ift.tt/HMgBQZ5
There is a multi-billion dollar industry dedicated to bringing men to orgasm.
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Submitted July 12, 2022 at 02:29AM by careater https://ift.tt/iVBfbo7
Submitted July 12, 2022 at 02:29AM by careater https://ift.tt/iVBfbo7
You can't really bite down, your jaw bites up.
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Submitted July 12, 2022 at 02:49AM by bloodyrubbers https://ift.tt/OCtYNid
Submitted July 12, 2022 at 02:49AM by bloodyrubbers https://ift.tt/OCtYNid
We intentionally put colonies of fungi in our dough to capture their farts so our bread can be fluffy
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Submitted July 12, 2022 at 01:33AM by MufasaMedic https://ift.tt/4J1fyA2
Submitted July 12, 2022 at 01:33AM by MufasaMedic https://ift.tt/4J1fyA2
For many people, the next funeral they attend will be their own.
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Submitted July 12, 2022 at 12:47AM by firstinitallastname https://ift.tt/48gEAQp
Submitted July 12, 2022 at 12:47AM by firstinitallastname https://ift.tt/48gEAQp
You know you’re getting old when waking up becomes a process
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Submitted July 11, 2022 at 03:35AM by bumpybrailler https://ift.tt/TPzu5Kd
Submitted July 11, 2022 at 03:35AM by bumpybrailler https://ift.tt/TPzu5Kd
We are still using a trading system, only difference being that we have currencies.
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Submitted July 11, 2022 at 02:50AM by LimonluMentos https://ift.tt/eBC5OPo
Submitted July 11, 2022 at 02:50AM by LimonluMentos https://ift.tt/eBC5OPo
You realize how much modern humans still use their fingernails when you get a hangnail
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Submitted July 11, 2022 at 01:49AM by dukerustfield https://ift.tt/ua4rtJ3
Submitted July 11, 2022 at 01:49AM by dukerustfield https://ift.tt/ua4rtJ3
3/3 of a cup is not 1 cup, its rather 99.9% repeating of a cup
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Submitted July 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by Darknesscomesfromyou https://ift.tt/SD76vxn
Submitted July 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by Darknesscomesfromyou https://ift.tt/SD76vxn
Moon has two seasons, Day and night.
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Submitted July 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by Rattimortal https://ift.tt/pFVovX1
Submitted July 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by Rattimortal https://ift.tt/pFVovX1
Alarms both save our lives and make them miserable
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:00AM by constipation999 https://ift.tt/Is5armd
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:00AM by constipation999 https://ift.tt/Is5armd
Your salary from your employer is the subscription fee they pay for you.
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:08AM by Mr_Ghostlore https://ift.tt/Hk8KboV
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:08AM by Mr_Ghostlore https://ift.tt/Hk8KboV
Clocks were probably invented before stuff like hours, minutes and seconds
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:22AM by Swiss_Nostalgia https://ift.tt/D2NQIwY
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:22AM by Swiss_Nostalgia https://ift.tt/D2NQIwY
Monster's watermelon drink is flavorless
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:36AM by unusual_arsenio https://ift.tt/6wxBbvX
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:36AM by unusual_arsenio https://ift.tt/6wxBbvX
Nature shows always film whales in slow motion to make them seem larger.
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:46AM by Haunting_Spot_8002 https://ift.tt/Lthlgv4
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 02:46AM by Haunting_Spot_8002 https://ift.tt/Lthlgv4
The majority of songs is older than you
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 01:48AM by QuarterPastTuesday https://ift.tt/qnPswdR
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 01:48AM by QuarterPastTuesday https://ift.tt/qnPswdR
As people get older, dick and titty pics start to look more and more similar.
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Submitted July 10, 2022 at 12:43AM by boricimo https://ift.tt/VQUWfHe
Submitted July 10, 2022 at 12:43AM by boricimo https://ift.tt/VQUWfHe
Alaska is the state that Texas still likes to think it is.
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Submitted July 09, 2022 at 03:44AM by KookinLeft https://ift.tt/MYGhx8W
Submitted July 09, 2022 at 03:44AM by KookinLeft https://ift.tt/MYGhx8W
Emma Watson looks like a typical british english teacher
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Submitted July 09, 2022 at 02:48AM by DeroZaza https://ift.tt/w52zHoh
Submitted July 09, 2022 at 02:48AM by DeroZaza https://ift.tt/w52zHoh
We're told to be quiet in libraries because people might be reading, but not in bookstores.
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Submitted July 09, 2022 at 12:50AM by Rigistroni https://ift.tt/iUkNxX8
Submitted July 09, 2022 at 12:50AM by Rigistroni https://ift.tt/iUkNxX8
We aren't really getting out of our comfort zone, we're just expanding it.
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Submitted July 08, 2022 at 04:47AM by HineyBottom https://ift.tt/CqKHowa
Submitted July 08, 2022 at 04:47AM by HineyBottom https://ift.tt/CqKHowa
Half way and middle are not the same thing….
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Submitted July 08, 2022 at 03:43AM by tibbymat https://ift.tt/tZw5yQD
Submitted July 08, 2022 at 03:43AM by tibbymat https://ift.tt/tZw5yQD
It doesn’t matter if we will ever run out of music. No one will live long enough to listen to it all
This probally applies to more things than just music.
Submitted July 08, 2022 at 02:50AM by skiemlord https://ift.tt/ypPTJ32
People who brand cows are burger flippers
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Submitted July 08, 2022 at 01:46AM by Jstang232 https://ift.tt/h6NB1Ap
Submitted July 08, 2022 at 01:46AM by Jstang232 https://ift.tt/h6NB1Ap
When 4 legged kids grow noticeably older, it's their mortality we worry about, but with 2 legged kids, it's ours.
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Submitted July 08, 2022 at 12:48AM by digitulgurl https://ift.tt/Ajvirca
Submitted July 08, 2022 at 12:48AM by digitulgurl https://ift.tt/Ajvirca
There is probably someone out there with reverse necrophilia, and they fantasize about being dead and getting f-ed by an alive person.
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:34AM by Incraigulous https://ift.tt/aGDVMOd
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:34AM by Incraigulous https://ift.tt/aGDVMOd
The only place everyone agrees it’s ok for all ages of people to be in underwear is the beach
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:35AM by TurboCharge420 https://ift.tt/kFpzaWh
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:35AM by TurboCharge420 https://ift.tt/kFpzaWh
Considering caffeine is a drug, cafes and coffee shops are drug dealers.
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:46AM by Zestyclose-Chef5215 https://ift.tt/3LTPSMA
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 03:46AM by Zestyclose-Chef5215 https://ift.tt/3LTPSMA
Adult comedies where one of the spouse constantly bang someone else by choice is more annoying than funny
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 02:49AM by Salamander-Downtown https://ift.tt/rYlAwX6
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 02:49AM by Salamander-Downtown https://ift.tt/rYlAwX6
There is no such thing as a fake dumbbell or weight, only mislabeled ones.
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 01:19AM by unethical_goose https://ift.tt/VhfRjQL
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 01:19AM by unethical_goose https://ift.tt/VhfRjQL
Donkey just kind of assumed that Shrek owned a waffle iron.
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Submitted July 07, 2022 at 12:48AM by Uu_Tea_ESharp https://ift.tt/srGbRgV
Submitted July 07, 2022 at 12:48AM by Uu_Tea_ESharp https://ift.tt/srGbRgV
Bed bugs have been around for millions of years and are named after something not more than a few thousand years old.
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 02:49AM by CromulentDucky https://ift.tt/JNKMDiq
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 02:49AM by CromulentDucky https://ift.tt/JNKMDiq
The more famous you are, the better your yard sales are.
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:37AM by legendsubie https://ift.tt/ecTfSaJ
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:37AM by legendsubie https://ift.tt/ecTfSaJ
In chess, the king never actually dies
The game always ends BEFORE the king dies
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:42AM by aviftw https://ift.tt/FC8lIWm
Dogs don't try to comfort you when you're crying, they just like the taste of your tears.
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:43AM by TomPerezzz https://ift.tt/5sGUgxN
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:43AM by TomPerezzz https://ift.tt/5sGUgxN
People who are born on November are mostly products of Valentine’s Day wrestling
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:44AM by KAMAKAZE15000 https://ift.tt/uUXvpBz
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:44AM by KAMAKAZE15000 https://ift.tt/uUXvpBz
The future AI will govern through digital history..
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:48AM by 253Tacoman https://ift.tt/NjitsqH
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 01:48AM by 253Tacoman https://ift.tt/NjitsqH
Many women find it disgusting that some men clean their penises in the sink, but these same women are not disgusted by giving a blowjob.
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Submitted July 06, 2022 at 12:46AM by TecnoSpider https://ift.tt/eahF1fA
Submitted July 06, 2022 at 12:46AM by TecnoSpider https://ift.tt/eahF1fA
Think of the most horrible, unspeakable, vile shit a human can do to other humans and most likely it exists on the dark web
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Submitted July 05, 2022 at 03:49AM by Mitxlove https://ift.tt/p5isc62
Submitted July 05, 2022 at 03:49AM by Mitxlove https://ift.tt/p5isc62
Liminal spaces are the uncanny valley of locations.
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Submitted July 05, 2022 at 02:45AM by VaporwaveVampire https://ift.tt/SaER8YX
Submitted July 05, 2022 at 02:45AM by VaporwaveVampire https://ift.tt/SaER8YX
Pretty soon, we'll have a generation of parents who can't show up to Career Day because they have an OnlyFans
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Submitted July 05, 2022 at 01:41AM by BerlinLoveLobster https://ift.tt/Y0O6E15
Submitted July 05, 2022 at 01:41AM by BerlinLoveLobster https://ift.tt/Y0O6E15
People with weak eye sight probably have never seen there glasses without weak eye sight
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Submitted July 05, 2022 at 12:32AM by Not_Your_ViBES https://ift.tt/JZ7ejOA
Submitted July 05, 2022 at 12:32AM by Not_Your_ViBES https://ift.tt/JZ7ejOA
People that fell from a deadly height might have survived the fall if the heart attack on the way down didn’t kill them.
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Submitted July 04, 2022 at 03:46AM by KurlyKev https://ift.tt/YjFQJwX
Submitted July 04, 2022 at 03:46AM by KurlyKev https://ift.tt/YjFQJwX
Vader wanted to turn and overthrow the Emperor, but his son wouldn't back him.
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Submitted July 04, 2022 at 02:47AM by RPM_Rocket https://ift.tt/9ZcUXrf
Submitted July 04, 2022 at 02:47AM by RPM_Rocket https://ift.tt/9ZcUXrf
Maine is not a main state in economic importance or population
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Submitted July 04, 2022 at 01:50AM by Katamariguy https://ift.tt/bgIQ7US
Submitted July 04, 2022 at 01:50AM by Katamariguy https://ift.tt/bgIQ7US
Based on the fable of the hare and the tortoise, a marathon runner will manage to cover 100 kilometers before Usain Bolt.
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Submitted July 04, 2022 at 12:46AM by Lord_Alviner https://ift.tt/uAUnCLm
Submitted July 04, 2022 at 12:46AM by Lord_Alviner https://ift.tt/uAUnCLm
Trees are technically solar powered
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Submitted July 03, 2022 at 04:48AM by Fresh_Proposal2938 https://ift.tt/PLkXWos
Submitted July 03, 2022 at 04:48AM by Fresh_Proposal2938 https://ift.tt/PLkXWos
People only care when they can get something from you.
And in this world, no wonder suicide rates are up.
People only care about themselves.
Submitted July 03, 2022 at 02:41AM by kingofmylunchtime https://ift.tt/bfMJzKp
The pinky toe is so neglected, but a crucial component of our posture.
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Submitted July 03, 2022 at 01:49AM by BasementTenant https://ift.tt/Ivczxh8
Submitted July 03, 2022 at 01:49AM by BasementTenant https://ift.tt/Ivczxh8
Most cats hate water, yet their favourite food is fish
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Submitted July 03, 2022 at 12:42AM by QAnnihilateQ64 https://ift.tt/dM9UPoB
Submitted July 03, 2022 at 12:42AM by QAnnihilateQ64 https://ift.tt/dM9UPoB
A majority of men who use urinals are walking around with urine splash back on their legs or pants.
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Submitted July 02, 2022 at 04:44AM by JammyDodgerMan https://ift.tt/ITFYyBm
Submitted July 02, 2022 at 04:44AM by JammyDodgerMan https://ift.tt/ITFYyBm
Geocaching is a good way to get other people’s fingerprints on evidence
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Submitted July 02, 2022 at 03:47AM by tetronic https://ift.tt/r3G7QLp
Submitted July 02, 2022 at 03:47AM by tetronic https://ift.tt/r3G7QLp
People must've actually wiped the floor with eachother during a fight
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Submitted July 02, 2022 at 02:45AM by Skyline952 https://ift.tt/Z4RE0z1
Submitted July 02, 2022 at 02:45AM by Skyline952 https://ift.tt/Z4RE0z1
There are probably a whole series of adventures that Harry Potter had with his invisibility cloak that JK Rowling left out of the books.
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Submitted July 02, 2022 at 01:44AM by Mr_Potamus https://ift.tt/hxuQZjO
Submitted July 02, 2022 at 01:44AM by Mr_Potamus https://ift.tt/hxuQZjO
left handed people must have a stronger weak hand compared to right handed people
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Submitted July 02, 2022 at 12:49AM by Present_Program_2344 https://ift.tt/jOM1wgq
Submitted July 02, 2022 at 12:49AM by Present_Program_2344 https://ift.tt/jOM1wgq