For maybe the past year and a half I've been experiencing weird changes in how I feel about my gender. Last year I dressed very androgynous and would rather not dress girly but could care less if I did. This year its gotten worse by 10 times. I over think my every move and my brain attacks me because in some fucking way whatever I did was feminine, I never dress girly now because it looks gross, and I wear my hair down because I get remarks that I look like a dude and it makes me happy when people say that (I even got mistaken for a guy by a doctor last month, my mom didn't like it much). A few months ago my mom told me that I would have to wear a dress to a dance and I broke down completely against my will: the very thought of wearing a dress made me recoil in disgust. I cried and my mom took me into her room to talk about it.. There was a lot of yelling and crying, she told me that "I was her little girl and that was that" and she asked me if I wanted to be a boy and i said no.. But it was the most unsure thing I've ever said...
Its been a few months and today I was trying on bras (we have pictures tomorrow and I have to wear a dress... Wish me luck) and I almost cried in the middle of penny's before I even got to the underwear department. I started trying them on in the dressing room and, in short, it ended in tears and my mom forcing her way in to talk to me. She said that she has no clue what's wrong with me and frankly neither do I...
I need to somehow ask to see some sort of out-of-school help... Preferably an unbiased one that will help me out with what the hell is going on... Thank you in advance.
Submitted April 07, 2019 at 12:00PM by _-_ew_-_ http://bit.ly/2CZcv9k
