Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:39AM by snowmonkey87 https://ift.tt/HJZDpwt
No one will ever truly know if the crazy people know they are crazy
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:39AM by snowmonkey87 https://ift.tt/HJZDpwt
We have no need for our earlobes
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:43AM by FaZe_poopy https://ift.tt/nY1OBPX
Our lives will be extremely and thoroughly documented to our grandchildren and the generations after.
too much data
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:44AM by Torvaldz_ https://ift.tt/kDlzN5p
The human race took a wrong turn somewhere
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 02:44AM by dontgoadthechode https://ift.tt/hPGwLSB
you’ve most likely read a celebrity’s post anonymously without realizing
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 01:46AM by altcoingodzilla https://ift.tt/Tr8XEyw
Not knowing how to use google is more embarrassing than not knowing how to change a tire
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 12:49AM by they_callme_j https://ift.tt/x7EdqJS
If the afterlife is real, there's probably been some really cool art produced about the topic of death that we haven't even seen yet.
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:42AM by BaronDinklevanDunkle https://ift.tt/hWXSp16
Even if you drive from New York to LA, the road you start on is connected to the road you’ll end up on in Los Angeles.
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:42AM by imightbehitler https://ift.tt/EiCPbYd
You only have you’re whole life ahead of you the moment you are born.
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:44AM by cblendzone https://ift.tt/QfdHyXO
A fat person is technically the apex predator if they hurt someone.
They are a Human Killer Whale
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:48AM by -Rasmus https://ift.tt/YTx7UAV
A hair dryer isn't 100% efficient as a hot dryer but is 100% efficient at being a space heater.
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:49AM by That_Guy2847 https://ift.tt/yLF2GJp
Some people cry for fictional characters more than their actual relatives
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 01:45AM by SkepticDrinker https://ift.tt/63Gnuzd
We dip our wings in ranch because dairy helps with spicy foods.
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 12:41AM by pierremanifesto https://ift.tt/lA0FKm4
Schools close for bigs holidays except Valentine’s Day
Submitted February 27, 2022 at 04:45AM by Little_Acanthaceae34 https://ift.tt/pXyND2u
You know if you love someone, but you can never be 100% sure if someone loves you.
Submitted February 27, 2022 at 03:48AM by hdylan99 https://ift.tt/qPeZsjr
Kids in the future will learn history through videos we took
Submitted February 27, 2022 at 02:50AM by Luna_15323 https://ift.tt/OetaDIV
We pronounce 'anxiety' as if it contains a 'g'
Submitted February 27, 2022 at 01:50AM by nimrodisease https://ift.tt/KYPAnSe
Emptying a tank full of helium makes it heavier.
Submitted February 27, 2022 at 12:49AM by Drink15 https://ift.tt/PnEYGLQ
Dressing your pet as humans is a reverse furry
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 02:49AM by ULiKaDaJuice https://ift.tt/lgeLoSs
There’s probably some pretty important things being missed since news stations are really only covering the conflict.
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 01:36AM by AppleberryJames https://ift.tt/nzMxS0e
All languages travel at the speed of sound, except for sign language, which travels at the speed of light.
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:43AM by putitinjustputitin https://ift.tt/Js4qWB0
Snowstorms are one of the few weather occurances that bring joy to some people, rather than inconvenience and damage.
Depending on who you are you may be thrilled so see a heavy snow, which brings with it sledding and other winter sports. I personally hate cleaning the shit up, but know it makes some people happy. Same can't really be said for a hurricane or earthquake.
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:44AM by galaxyfrapp https://ift.tt/wDS8eBy
Sadly, nepotism is still the most reliable predictor of success.
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:44AM by VerbotenPublish https://ift.tt/PQal8iJ
Catgirls would have 4 ears, and 8 tits
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:45AM by depressed_asian_boy_ https://ift.tt/yVioM70
Parents Have Definitely Dropped Their Baby’s Way More Than We Think
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:47AM by HercHuntsdirty https://ift.tt/TjQlod7
Everyone having bombs is the same as no one having bombs.
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:23AM by luwaonline1 https://ift.tt/NOa7rWz
All of your kicks are dropkicks... if you only have one leg.
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:29AM by Piyaniist https://ift.tt/RPtHuzD
We are actively living in a Wall-E prequel.
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:38AM by usergirl2468 https://ift.tt/DvGUuhF
2019 was probably the last actual good year we had and will have in many many years
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:44AM by Acrobatic-Net994 https://ift.tt/x8rP2nG
There is a chance that a lot of people are going to have to buy new maps/globes soon.
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:46AM by schikaba https://ift.tt/5Qbnypo
It must be a weird day on the space station.
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 01:47AM by icepost https://ift.tt/cnR2hPI
In 50 years Bart Simpson will be telling his grandchildren a story that begins in twenty dickety two
Submitted February 25, 2022 at 12:49AM by sjspho https://ift.tt/B4YNiCg
People respect critical thinking until it contradicts their opinions and feelings.
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:55AM by ChronicContrition https://ift.tt/sgxn12h
We are only 2022 Years late to the Death of Christ
And yet the day humans will officially go extinct is in 5 Billion years.
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:55AM by Kek_and_Cringe https://ift.tt/es3mYBE
If you give a Ladybug some drugs it will probably die
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:58AM by uncertain6786 https://ift.tt/2AwSTq7
Having an identical twin is the closest you’ll come to seeing yourself in person.
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:04AM by PenguinBeatbox https://ift.tt/gZ9HChI
Dating Sims are to video games as Romantic Comedies are to Movies
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 01:49AM by Pasta-hobo https://ift.tt/yrU7mNq
Cats are probably going through an evolutionary process that helps them open door handles (albeit very slowly)
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 12:50AM by PissAnt5 https://ift.tt/4xjWqkE
We make out to music because it makes us feel like a character in a romance movie.
Submitted February 23, 2022 at 04:54AM by pimpmastahanhduece https://ift.tt/QrlDVJ8
There are some secrets in history that we will NEVER discover
Submitted February 23, 2022 at 03:45AM by Rojester2 https://ift.tt/BIT67Vv
Stuffy noses are a lot scarier for horses.
Submitted February 23, 2022 at 02:50AM by PixelJack79 https://ift.tt/9U6tDu1
Even though premature death does occasionally happen, every single one of your personal ancestors - back to the dawn of our species - survived to at least childbearing age. Every one of us is the direct descendant of an unimaginable number of survivors.
Submitted February 23, 2022 at 01:49AM by SimilarLee https://ift.tt/hvXaYsq
Singers get paid for glorified talking
Submitted February 23, 2022 at 12:49AM by Woodedbird https://ift.tt/2CIqX5b
It takes hard work and determination to get addicted to cigarettes.
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 02:49AM by numbnesstolife https://ift.tt/81hHQrl
Conspiracy theories are popular because people have boring lives.
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 01:48AM by CraZScotsman https://ift.tt/c8sBewK
Doppelgangers probably have more things in common than their appearance
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:42AM by Pablitomaestro https://ift.tt/emC9u2P
If you mention the Queen to someone, you're almost certain they understand who you're talking about. If you mention the King, that's not so sure.
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:43AM by Shiyayo https://ift.tt/0BrbRhL
Dinosaurs killed 0 people last year, you killed 0 people last year so basically your as dangerous as a dinosaur
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by ArticleSand2 https://ift.tt/gG6S0YV
Cheetachs must be really confused when a sprinter starts catching up to them.
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by Salumel https://ift.tt/3YqPx9n
Glasses, keys, wallet, phone is the adult version of head, shoulders, knees, and phone.
Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by Alecto53558 https://ift.tt/41a9YUb
Bohemian Rhapsody is technically the prequel to Straight Outta Compton
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 02:50AM by Justbecauseweiner https://ift.tt/fc5u89d
Your brain could be classified as a battery as it could power a light bulb.
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:47AM by AuraStome https://ift.tt/7TFdt62
Food is art with a very short life span
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by ChookityPok1 https://ift.tt/M8CYqFS
Ugly girls statistically have tighter vaginas for obvious reasons therefore make better lovers
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by suavecool21692169 https://ift.tt/PNDm8Mk
cars are suprisingly dangerous for being everywhere
stairs too
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:49AM by concrete_bags https://ift.tt/GP5gYi8
If all life in the universe dies, so does Death
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:49AM by Brandini-A197 https://ift.tt/VWrdYLO
The metal of the surfaces Obi-Wan and Anakin touched while dueling on Mustafar were probably unbearably, scalding hot
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 12:46AM by InfinityScientist https://ift.tt/2iYFUPQ
Batman was scared of bats and became Batman but Catwoman loves cats and became Catwoman
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:41AM by WallStreetDoesntBet https://ift.tt/wuyTj4r
When you're young and there's a loud noise, your parents comfort you. When you grow up and there's a loud noise, you comfort your parents.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:41AM by alphabeta_g https://ift.tt/1UzYNKE
Explode and implode are opposites; explore and implore are not.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:43AM by Zytharros https://ift.tt/qX15lsL
We’ve all agreed upon the artificial watermelon flavor despite it tasting nothing like an actual watermelon.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:50AM by ashthundercrow https://ift.tt/v5psDJm
The most gaudy wedding rings with the largest stones are the likeliest to get returned.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 01:46AM by Sagnikk https://ift.tt/Rr1FWeY
Even though they are structurally the same, we never peel limes or lemons like we do oranges.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 01:49AM by chickensunited https://ift.tt/lQCzG1R
Dimples are a genetic deformity but we like them because they show up when people are happy.
Submitted February 20, 2022 at 12:47AM by MacklemoreX https://ift.tt/etcMkwP
You have been dying from your first breath
Submitted February 19, 2022 at 05:09AM by redditor7588 https://ift.tt/7EcGC1d
If your identical twin died, what evidence is there, other than your word, that you are not him and the person that died is you.
Submitted February 19, 2022 at 03:57AM by Critical_Tip_4059 https://ift.tt/XdwL8mY
Your 85 year old granddaughter is your uncle’s daughter and your father is your mother’s son and your brother is your cousin’s nephew and your wife is your uncle’s niece
Submitted February 19, 2022 at 02:45AM by WallStreetDoesntBet https://ift.tt/9khYb6n
Cup cakes are made in cake cups.
Submitted February 19, 2022 at 01:51AM by Papythorinque https://ift.tt/IP7xRMv
Green beans don’t look anything like an actual bean.
Submitted February 19, 2022 at 12:55AM by QuickIOS https://ift.tt/fbe0acA
Pessimists are never disappointed
Submitted February 18, 2022 at 04:47AM by npc0112358 https://ift.tt/Uij1H90
Someone probably has had the same password as you
Submitted February 18, 2022 at 03:46AM by LemonTables https://ift.tt/qQ8Svnf
The dumber the ad, the more attention it gets.
Submitted February 18, 2022 at 02:48AM by memes-central https://ift.tt/uYM5R78
Being adult is when you stop being offended by 'yo momma' jokes and start agreeing with them
Submitted February 18, 2022 at 01:47AM by Nekomiminya https://ift.tt/N86RdiW
Laptop speakers are too quiet for music, but too loud for porn.
Submitted February 18, 2022 at 12:45AM by Poohbizzle79 https://ift.tt/e1baZF5
Going to your cell phone provider to accomplish something is becoming the new trip to the dmv.
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 02:46AM by tojro https://ift.tt/5gmw6ou
Maps are globe paintings, while globes are map spheroids
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 01:49AM by The_Pumpkin_Fan https://ift.tt/jvtOu7h
People cringe at the word moist but have no problem saying moisturizer.
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:30AM by Mdizzle29 https://ift.tt/kIidhb4
People assume your money as theirs, and then tell you that you're wasting your money
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:32AM by balatitan https://ift.tt/rDgPE3x
There's a possibility there are other sounds out there, but our brains can't comprehend them
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:34AM by Not_Mutahar https://ift.tt/7hE9Fj0
maybe dogs think they are walking us.
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:47AM by sajjolH https://ift.tt/GkFVyAs
If you want to shop without looking at the price tag, you gotta work without looking at the clock
Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:49AM by cjdj24252425 https://ift.tt/9N7jp8D
The loading percentage only really exists so people know their computer didn’t freeze.
Submitted February 16, 2022 at 04:45AM by TrippinShrimp https://ift.tt/vCycJQR
There is no such thing as an unsuccessful ratio. You still make a ratio, you're just the lower number.
Submitted February 16, 2022 at 03:49AM by ProfessionalDunce https://ift.tt/LMva8up
Some people will be happy if you get high so that they can in their opinion, be the better person
Submitted February 16, 2022 at 02:49AM by AlfredNotSoGreat https://ift.tt/PKsr1ya
When watching videos of people being kind and helping out others, we always think we need more people that are kind, but in reality, we need to BE the kind people
Submitted February 16, 2022 at 01:43AM by Mutraxation https://ift.tt/6v7pNoW
Every bit of energy you use brings the universe slightly closer to its end
Submitted February 16, 2022 at 12:46AM by QueenElsaArrendelle https://ift.tt/1fNekVX
We study world history so that we may not repeat our mistakes and so that we may tell better jokes.
Submitted February 15, 2022 at 04:50AM by UncleIye https://ift.tt/yzUmbWk
You must have an identical twin to see yourself in the way the world sees you
Submitted February 15, 2022 at 03:42AM by Political_Piper https://ift.tt/GrUesFX
Zombies are the only people who will eat your ass
Submitted February 15, 2022 at 02:50AM by Several_Marzipan3807 https://ift.tt/AlyZzb1
Chuck Norris must be able to read the Voynich manuscript.
Submitted February 15, 2022 at 01:38AM by dee232323 https://ift.tt/ashC6Ly
laws have so many rules that it becomes a profession to remember it all
Submitted February 15, 2022 at 12:49AM by Venus_Fly_Trap137 https://ift.tt/ktd1Qe2
If you found the perfect hiding spot, you did not find the perfect hiding spot
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 02:49AM by dg327 https://ift.tt/pijCHkt
Surgeons are legally allowed to stab people.
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 01:47AM by IgnasBulka https://ift.tt/8SMCmEe
People had to draw each and every line on every road in the world.
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:36AM by ThavTheBoringDragon https://ift.tt/eh563fz
Most of the dogs from the first Puppy Bowl are dead
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:37AM by invalid_user_taken https://ift.tt/pDdeNRI
If humans were mouse-sized, cats would end us.
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:40AM by KENYAD1GGIT https://ift.tt/9nbEHIY
the fashion industry dislikes large models because there's a smaller profit margin on larger sized clothes
.....i think
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:47AM by whydub38 https://ift.tt/Qlmrxvd
Mount St. Helens was an inside job.
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:48AM by ZergFromToyStory https://ift.tt/bSYtcTG
Lingerie is the clothing version of The Streisand Effect. You really become extra focused on and aware of the body parts that are covered up.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 02:50AM by 2ND_Dinner https://ift.tt/pHyjvq0
Having a big heart and having an enlarged heart have vastly different implications.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:38AM by The_Wack_Knight https://ift.tt/UfN9T3E
A person with a smaller mouth is probably healthier then a person with a larger mouth because they can't eat as fast.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:41AM by Come_Quickly_Comrade https://ift.tt/or61Ipk
If you adopt a cat who’s previous owner died, there’s a chance the cat ate a bit of them.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:42AM by Villan_99 https://ift.tt/crpgujo
Коммунизм никогда не сработает, так что просто перестаньте его прославлять.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:48AM by AlbertMendez442 https://ift.tt/nbCPwjI
We've probably forgotten several important things while storing memories binge watching TV.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:49AM by ActualGrowth1335 https://ift.tt/zjcL5vP
If the birthday cutoff for western schools is around September 1st, the cutoff to get pregnant is around Thanksgiving.
Submitted February 13, 2022 at 12:49AM by TheOneAndOnlyHydra https://ift.tt/Bda1fGJ
There are fully grown young adults amongst us that have never used Windows XP.
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:44AM by SUbl8987 https://ift.tt/CrJStDU
Animals in cartoons must be jealous of their anthropomorphic counterparts.
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:46AM by ral365 https://ift.tt/QjPtns1
People who wear glasses supposedly look smart, but they ironically had to fail a test to get the glasses
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:48AM by Open-Second-5787 https://ift.tt/jd953PL
There are more micro organisms in your body than there are people on earth.
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 02:49AM by Yakisobath34 https://ift.tt/JkPaLTW
Biblical depictions of angles are creepy because they are supposed to be 4th dimensional beings. When 3D humans get CAT scans, the 2D images look creepy because we are viewing a 3D person in one less dimension.
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 01:47AM by unbecoming_class https://ift.tt/IL2Soz3
you get stressed because you don’t know what to do, but you don’t know what to do because you are stressed
Submitted February 12, 2022 at 12:48AM by sajjolH https://ift.tt/Ed6pgkG
Bob Saget bumped his head, went to bed and didn’t get up in the morning.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 02:44AM by searchingtofind25 https://ift.tt/nAX3eIY
Freedom is going to be an NFT
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 01:44AM by Inigogoboots https://ift.tt/K54SRy9
Someone’s living a third world life in a first world country, and someone else is enjoying a first world life in a third world country.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:32AM by wormholetrafficjam https://ift.tt/CQ5dmxY
Gravity is a potentially infinite source of energg
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:40AM by WyvernKid93 https://ift.tt/l2nj1cp
To improve the world there ought to be fewer pedants. Definitely not less pedants, but fewer.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:40AM by pufballcat https://ift.tt/HF3PZgp
Sitcoms often end with the main characters moving out of their houses so that the crew can get a jump on set striking.
Think about it. Friends, The Nanny, New Girl, Fresh Prince, Golden Girls, I think even How I Met Your Mother, I could go on. It makes sense, tho. It’s a logical reason to be in an empty house, and saves time on striking the set after it ends.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:46AM by peaches_1922 https://ift.tt/D3J64Nh
It is likely, due to natural selection, that at some point in your life, an evolutionary dead end has looked down you, smugly.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by ComradeVISIXVI https://ift.tt/BqaYOo1
We could all potentially be middle aged and just not know it yet
Who knows when we'll die.
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 04:46AM by TornApartByLisa https://ift.tt/Wx9VweD
When the younger generations start watching Star Wars they’ll eventually think of Yoda as Old Grogu
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 03:46AM by ChrisOuzou https://ift.tt/PSYLbFn
Toasters need a snooze button to cook for another 30 seconds without forgetting about it.
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 02:42AM by smileedude https://ift.tt/K4MomiL
Society views teenagers who love or hate the rich as cringe.
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 01:50AM by Difficult-Point-8665 https://ift.tt/5Q0XS8R
If you're chased by a serial killer you're both running for your life
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 12:47AM by Greysbastard https://ift.tt/s4VnhCg
Life could be much more peaceful if humans could close their ears
Submitted February 09, 2022 at 04:49AM by bamman527 https://ift.tt/jXl9AKm
Going on a snow skiing trip and never actually touching snow is easily doable.
Submitted February 09, 2022 at 03:46AM by dcdttu https://ift.tt/touQ9Tw
In Disneys Tangled, all Mother Gothel had to do was lie to Rapunzel about when her birthday was and she might not have been so curious about the floating lanterns and would have stayed in the tower forever.
Submitted February 09, 2022 at 02:46AM by ObserveTheGreyArea https://ift.tt/mGAX78y
since rat poison works on people too, there's really no need to keep calling it rat poison
Submitted February 09, 2022 at 01:49AM by CentrePeace https://ift.tt/vBjJPSl
Every major company says race does not matter and everyone is equal….but they still require you to put your race on job applications
Submitted February 09, 2022 at 12:48AM by Cautious_Guess_6026 https://ift.tt/YdifjGt
It only take 2 people at an auction to set the monetary value of an item; and to all other similar items moving forward.
Submitted February 08, 2022 at 04:49AM by Souskei https://ift.tt/tUMxAbr
Prince Phillip died at 99 because he could never keep it 100
Submitted February 08, 2022 at 03:48AM by GroundbreakingAd7855 https://ift.tt/r5FNb9M
The longer you wait to have sex the more embarrassing it will be when the other person realises
Submitted February 08, 2022 at 02:50AM by JackzGamez2009 https://ift.tt/rlok8fm
The planets at the edges of the universe experience night skies with no stars
Submitted February 08, 2022 at 01:43AM by ErgoNonSim https://ift.tt/58cJBMv
You have to get-up, because you fall-asleep
Submitted February 08, 2022 at 12:39AM by electricdingaling https://ift.tt/WRaAZi9
USB-Sticks, a technology in decline are gaining a revival as crypto currency wallets
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:47AM by onlyforthisjob https://ift.tt/83BI7ag
If social networks would use their hyperintelligent algoritms to make us better people we would probably be willing to pay more for using it than advertisers pay for us
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:49AM by medBrain https://ift.tt/9sUbJck
You are someone's reason to masturbate
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:50AM by danclimpertec https://ift.tt/tI4hiWl
It is impossible for there to be complete silence. Try it.
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:40AM by Gezoredditing https://ift.tt/DYEWZOa
Think about it, you either have a nappy-poo or a poopy nap. Choose wisely
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:41AM by Circuit-Breaker-13 https://ift.tt/S05AcKa
Wind is earth’s Ninja. You can’t actually see it, it’ll kick your ass and there’s no way to fight back.
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:41AM by Buffalones https://ift.tt/G2wLkzv
There is an Office at Microsoft that uses Microsoft Office to send an email to another Office at Microsoft about Microsoft Office.
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:44AM by VincentLecavalier04 https://ift.tt/tKxfMUS
A human stands a better chance against a shark on land than a shark stands against a human in the water.
Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:49AM by adamantcondition https://ift.tt/GUFhCeZ
Miami is closer to Havana Cuba than it is to Orlando.
Submitted February 06, 2022 at 04:49AM by JohnWarosa69420 https://ift.tt/fM1rKIw
If humans relocated to another habitable planet outside our solar system, we'd have to rename sunglasses.
Submitted February 06, 2022 at 03:46AM by Spiderdan https://ift.tt/0UXueGt
If someone is engaged in a 'dick-measuring' contest, they must have stiff competition.
Submitted February 06, 2022 at 02:45AM by Mike_OxonFaier https://ift.tt/adYu5VI
Some ideas sound amazing in our head, but when we let them out, we sort of wish we were dead
Submitted February 06, 2022 at 01:46AM by blitzmeme69 https://ift.tt/YmlrusC
The likelihood of getting a fast food burger that looks like the photograph decreases in direct relation to how close you are to a standard mealtime.
Submitted February 06, 2022 at 12:39AM by SoupIsAHotSmoothie https://ift.tt/zOeLdyX
Interviews is all about telling a story and making them believe in that.
Submitted February 05, 2022 at 04:50AM by xpiercedangelx https://ift.tt/tkdDBan
The Xbox logo contains half of the standard buttons on a Playstation controller.
Submitted February 05, 2022 at 03:48AM by MaroonTrucker28 https://ift.tt/gNLGBVX
If a particular word is offensive and a replacement word is used as substitute, eventually the replacement word becomes the new offensive word. The cycle continues in perpetuity.
Submitted February 05, 2022 at 02:49AM by IronHe https://ift.tt/uh0qxYR
Every second that passes is a second that we will never get back
Submitted February 05, 2022 at 01:49AM by Xxcringy-usernamexX https://ift.tt/GvIW3iF
All worms are earth worms.
Submitted February 05, 2022 at 12:48AM by Charlesox https://ift.tt/0Nascmt
Going to Pizza Express in Woking is a very unusual thing for one to do
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 02:48AM by Spare-Percentage2566 https://ift.tt/Bb3o7EU
If signatures were required on all delivered packages, porch pirates wouldn't be a thing
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:38AM by Inauspiciouscrow https://ift.tt/AuxavhB
A survival knife can also be an anti-survival knife
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:40AM by Fuck_Fucker_Fuckest_ https://ift.tt/dPrN1gH
Ever human that has ever lived has traveled at the same fastest speed
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by moneybot13 https://ift.tt/uCGfrvI
There is no one to close the door when the bus driver gets off
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by Espe0nUmbre0n https://ift.tt/6FjTkVM
With the rise of online banking, the burglary industry is going to take a major hit
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by my_choice_was_taken https://ift.tt/jLntyvo
Dragons are to dinosaurs what the devil is to humans: fire breath, horns, wings, and higher malicious intelligence
Submitted February 04, 2022 at 12:42AM by GoatsWithWigs https://ift.tt/RCuZrYWKM
Anything can become a melee weapon, like a slice of pizza.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 04:48AM by ShadowKirbo https://ift.tt/ZAP8Vz6Tn
There are cabinets in houses, but no housets in cabins.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 03:48AM by indiequick https://ift.tt/dkbST9qin
As individuals & as a society, what we do know often holds us back more than what we don’t know.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 02:49AM by Turbulent-Specific39 https://ift.tt/mza0qwG6W
Dogs with homeless people are probably stolen
Human societies won't adopt out to homeless people, Breeders usually charge large fees that homeless can't afford, and strays are usually picked up quick by public agencies.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 01:48AM by PNWgriz https://ift.tt/4Vn0B32AM
The hardest thing about being dumb is people treating as dumb, and being right.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 12:48AM by echo_zoo https://ift.tt/KkeGCcyoZ
Men who like to be pegged by their girlfriends are probably not completely honest about their own sexuality with themselves
Submitted February 02, 2022 at 04:49AM by Reddit_Ghost2021 https://ift.tt/e8NYc3juO
if you’ve noticed your electric toothbrush’s battery lasting longer than usual, you probably haven’t been brushing long enough lately.
Submitted February 02, 2022 at 03:38AM by eatmorecake99 https://ift.tt/wsvWmbcRh
When breaking up - it’s much easier to irrationally hate the other than it is to rationalize the root cause of diversion
Submitted February 02, 2022 at 02:48AM by longtommy02 https://ift.tt/upIo8i9cS
The next generation will not know school closures like we did because they will be on zoom instead of having the entire day off.
Submitted February 02, 2022 at 01:43AM by Armaan204 https://ift.tt/kTS8XWHbQ
Email is the original DM.
Submitted February 02, 2022 at 12:48AM by somethinggoeshere11 https://ift.tt/YkhiqjOs5