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Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:39AM by snowmonkey87 https://ift.tt/HJZDp...
We have no need for our earlobes
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Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:43AM by FaZe_poopy https://ift.tt/nY1OB...
Our lives will be extremely and thoroughly documented to our grandchildren and the generations after.
too much data
Submitted March 01, 2022 at 03:44AM by Torvaldz_ https://ift.tt/kDlzN...
The human race took a wrong turn somewhere
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Submitted March 01, 2022 at 02:44AM by dontgoadthechode https://ift.tt/hPGwL...
you’ve most likely read a celebrity’s post anonymously without realizing
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Submitted March 01, 2022 at 01:46AM by altcoingodzilla https://ift.tt/Tr8XE...
Not knowing how to use google is more embarrassing than not knowing how to change a tire
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Submitted March 01, 2022 at 12:49AM by they_callme_j https://ift.tt/x7Edq...
If the afterlife is real, there's probably been some really cool art produced about the topic of death that we haven't even seen yet.
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:42AM by BaronDinklevanDunkle https://ift.tt/hWXSp...
Even if you drive from New York to LA, the road you start on is connected to the road you’ll end up on in Los Angeles.
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:42AM by imightbehitler https://ift.tt/EiCPb...
You only have you’re whole life ahead of you the moment you are born.
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:44AM by cblendzone https://ift.tt/QfdHy...
A fat person is technically the apex predator if they hurt someone.
They are a Human Killer Whale
Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:48AM by -Rasmus https://ift.tt/YTx7U...
A hair dryer isn't 100% efficient as a hot dryer but is 100% efficient at being a space heater.
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 02:49AM by That_Guy2847 https://ift.tt/yLF2G...
Some people cry for fictional characters more than their actual relatives
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 01:45AM by SkepticDrinker https://ift.tt/63Gnu...
We dip our wings in ranch because dairy helps with spicy foods.
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Submitted February 28, 2022 at 12:41AM by pierremanifesto https://ift.tt/lA0FK...
Schools close for bigs holidays except Valentine’s Day
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Submitted February 27, 2022 at 04:45AM by Little_Acanthaceae34 https://ift.tt/pXyND...
You know if you love someone, but you can never be 100% sure if someone loves you.
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Submitted February 27, 2022 at 03:48AM by hdylan99 https://ift.tt/qPeZs...
Kids in the future will learn history through videos we took
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Submitted February 27, 2022 at 02:50AM by Luna_15323 https://ift.tt/OetaD...
We pronounce 'anxiety' as if it contains a 'g'
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Submitted February 27, 2022 at 01:50AM by nimrodisease https://ift.tt/KYPAn...
Emptying a tank full of helium makes it heavier.
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Submitted February 27, 2022 at 12:49AM by Drink15 https://ift.tt/PnEYG...
Dressing your pet as humans is a reverse furry
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 02:49AM by ULiKaDaJuice https://ift.tt/lgeLo...
There’s probably some pretty important things being missed since news stations are really only covering the conflict.
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 01:36AM by AppleberryJames https://ift.tt/nzMxS...
All languages travel at the speed of sound, except for sign language, which travels at the speed of light.
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:43AM by putitinjustputitin https://ift.tt/Js4qW...
Snowstorms are one of the few weather occurances that bring joy to some people, rather than inconvenience and damage.
Depending on who you are you may be thrilled so see a heavy snow, which brings with it sledding and other winter sports. I personally hate cleaning the shit up, but know it makes some people happy. Same can't really be said for a hurricane or earthquake.
Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:44AM by galaxyfrapp https://ift.tt/wDS8e...
Sadly, nepotism is still the most reliable predictor of success.
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:44AM by VerbotenPublish https://ift.tt/PQal8...
Catgirls would have 4 ears, and 8 tits
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:45AM by depressed_asian_boy_ https://ift.tt/yVioM...
Parents Have Definitely Dropped Their Baby’s Way More Than We Think
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Submitted February 26, 2022 at 12:47AM by HercHuntsdirty https://ift.tt/TjQlo...
Everyone having bombs is the same as no one having bombs.
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:23AM by luwaonline1 https://ift.tt/NOa7r...
All of your kicks are dropkicks... if you only have one leg.
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:29AM by Piyaniist https://ift.tt/RPtHu...
We are actively living in a Wall-E prequel.
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:38AM by usergirl2468 https://ift.tt/DvGUu...
2019 was probably the last actual good year we had and will have in many many years
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:44AM by Acrobatic-Net994 https://ift.tt/x8rP2...
There is a chance that a lot of people are going to have to buy new maps/globes soon.
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 02:46AM by schikaba https://ift.tt/5Qbny...
It must be a weird day on the space station.
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 01:47AM by icepost https://ift.tt/cnR2h...
In 50 years Bart Simpson will be telling his grandchildren a story that begins in twenty dickety two
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Submitted February 25, 2022 at 12:49AM by sjspho https://ift.tt/B4YNi...
People respect critical thinking until it contradicts their opinions and feelings.
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Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:55AM by ChronicContrition https://ift.tt/sgxn1...
We are only 2022 Years late to the Death of Christ
And yet the day humans will officially go extinct is in 5 Billion years.
Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:55AM by Kek_and_Cringe https://ift.tt/es3mY...
If you give a Ladybug some drugs it will probably die
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Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:58AM by uncertain6786 https://ift.tt/2AwST...
Having an identical twin is the closest you’ll come to seeing yourself in person.
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Submitted February 24, 2022 at 03:04AM by PenguinBeatbox https://ift.tt/gZ9HC...
Dating Sims are to video games as Romantic Comedies are to Movies
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Submitted February 24, 2022 at 01:49AM by Pasta-hobo https://ift.tt/yrU7m...
Cats are probably going through an evolutionary process that helps them open door handles (albeit very slowly)
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Submitted February 24, 2022 at 12:50AM by PissAnt5 https://ift.tt/4xjWq...
We make out to music because it makes us feel like a character in a romance movie.
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Submitted February 23, 2022 at 04:54AM by pimpmastahanhduece https://ift.tt/QrlDV...
There are some secrets in history that we will NEVER discover
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Submitted February 23, 2022 at 03:45AM by Rojester2 https://ift.tt/BIT67...
Stuffy noses are a lot scarier for horses.
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Submitted February 23, 2022 at 02:50AM by PixelJack79 https://ift.tt/9U6tD...
Even though premature death does occasionally happen, every single one of your personal ancestors - back to the dawn of our species - survived to at least childbearing age. Every one of us is the direct descendant of an unimaginable number of survivors.
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Submitted February 23, 2022 at 01:49AM by SimilarLee https://ift.tt/hvXaY...
Singers get paid for glorified talking
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Submitted February 23, 2022 at 12:49AM by Woodedbird https://ift.tt/2CIqX...
It takes hard work and determination to get addicted to cigarettes.
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 02:49AM by numbnesstolife https://ift.tt/81hHQ...
Conspiracy theories are popular because people have boring lives.
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 01:48AM by CraZScotsman https://ift.tt/c8sBe...
Doppelgangers probably have more things in common than their appearance
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:42AM by Pablitomaestro https://ift.tt/emC9u...
If you mention the Queen to someone, you're almost certain they understand who you're talking about. If you mention the King, that's not so sure.
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:43AM by Shiyayo https://ift.tt/0BrbR...
Dinosaurs killed 0 people last year, you killed 0 people last year so basically your as dangerous as a dinosaur
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by ArticleSand2 https://ift.tt/gG6S0...
Cheetachs must be really confused when a sprinter starts catching up to them.
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by Salumel https://ift.tt/3YqPx...
Glasses, keys, wallet, phone is the adult version of head, shoulders, knees, and phone.
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Submitted February 22, 2022 at 12:45AM by Alecto53558 https://ift.tt/41a9Y...
Bohemian Rhapsody is technically the prequel to Straight Outta Compton
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 02:50AM by Justbecauseweiner https://ift.tt/fc5u8...
Your brain could be classified as a battery as it could power a light bulb.
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:47AM by AuraStome https://ift.tt/7TFdt...
Food is art with a very short life span
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by ChookityPok1 https://ift.tt/M8CYq...
Ugly girls statistically have tighter vaginas for obvious reasons therefore make better lovers
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:48AM by suavecool21692169 https://ift.tt/PNDm8...
cars are suprisingly dangerous for being everywhere
stairs too
Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:49AM by concrete_bags https://ift.tt/GP5gY...
If all life in the universe dies, so does Death
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 01:49AM by Brandini-A197 https://ift.tt/VWrdY...
The metal of the surfaces Obi-Wan and Anakin touched while dueling on Mustafar were probably unbearably, scalding hot
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Submitted February 21, 2022 at 12:46AM by InfinityScientist https://ift.tt/2iYFU...
Batman was scared of bats and became Batman but Catwoman loves cats and became Catwoman
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:41AM by WallStreetDoesntBet https://ift.tt/wuyTj...
When you're young and there's a loud noise, your parents comfort you. When you grow up and there's a loud noise, you comfort your parents.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:41AM by alphabeta_g https://ift.tt/1UzYN...
Explode and implode are opposites; explore and implore are not.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:43AM by Zytharros https://ift.tt/qX15l...
We’ve all agreed upon the artificial watermelon flavor despite it tasting nothing like an actual watermelon.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 02:50AM by ashthundercrow https://ift.tt/v5psD...
The most gaudy wedding rings with the largest stones are the likeliest to get returned.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 01:46AM by Sagnikk https://ift.tt/Rr1FW...
Even though they are structurally the same, we never peel limes or lemons like we do oranges.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 01:49AM by chickensunited https://ift.tt/lQCzG...
Dimples are a genetic deformity but we like them because they show up when people are happy.
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Submitted February 20, 2022 at 12:47AM by MacklemoreX https://ift.tt/etcMk...
You have been dying from your first breath
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Submitted February 19, 2022 at 05:09AM by redditor7588 https://ift.tt/7EcGC...
If your identical twin died, what evidence is there, other than your word, that you are not him and the person that died is you.
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Submitted February 19, 2022 at 03:57AM by Critical_Tip_4059 https://ift.tt/XdwL8...
Your 85 year old granddaughter is your uncle’s daughter and your father is your mother’s son and your brother is your cousin’s nephew and your wife is your uncle’s niece
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Submitted February 19, 2022 at 02:45AM by WallStreetDoesntBet https://ift.tt/9khYb...
Cup cakes are made in cake cups.
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Submitted February 19, 2022 at 01:51AM by Papythorinque https://ift.tt/IP7xR...
Green beans don’t look anything like an actual bean.
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Submitted February 19, 2022 at 12:55AM by QuickIOS https://ift.tt/fbe0a...
Pessimists are never disappointed
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Submitted February 18, 2022 at 04:47AM by npc0112358 https://ift.tt/Uij1H...
Someone probably has had the same password as you
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Submitted February 18, 2022 at 03:46AM by LemonTables https://ift.tt/qQ8Sv...
The dumber the ad, the more attention it gets.
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Submitted February 18, 2022 at 02:48AM by memes-central https://ift.tt/uYM5R...
Being adult is when you stop being offended by 'yo momma' jokes and start agreeing with them
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Submitted February 18, 2022 at 01:47AM by Nekomiminya https://ift.tt/N86Rd...
Laptop speakers are too quiet for music, but too loud for porn.
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Submitted February 18, 2022 at 12:45AM by Poohbizzle79 https://ift.tt/e1baZ...
Going to your cell phone provider to accomplish something is becoming the new trip to the dmv.
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 02:46AM by tojro https://ift.tt/5gmw6...
Maps are globe paintings, while globes are map spheroids
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 01:49AM by The_Pumpkin_Fan https://ift.tt/jvtOu...
People cringe at the word moist but have no problem saying moisturizer.
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:30AM by Mdizzle29 https://ift.tt/kIidh...
People assume your money as theirs, and then tell you that you're wasting your money
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:32AM by balatitan https://ift.tt/rDgPE...
There's a possibility there are other sounds out there, but our brains can't comprehend them
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:34AM by Not_Mutahar https://ift.tt/7hE9F...
maybe dogs think they are walking us.
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:47AM by sajjolH https://ift.tt/GkFVy...
If you want to shop without looking at the price tag, you gotta work without looking at the clock
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Submitted February 17, 2022 at 12:49AM by cjdj24252425 https://ift.tt/9N7jp...
The loading percentage only really exists so people know their computer didn’t freeze.
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Submitted February 16, 2022 at 04:45AM by TrippinShrimp https://ift.tt/vCycJ...
There is no such thing as an unsuccessful ratio. You still make a ratio, you're just the lower number.
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Submitted February 16, 2022 at 03:49AM by ProfessionalDunce https://ift.tt/LMva8...
Some people will be happy if you get high so that they can in their opinion, be the better person
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Submitted February 16, 2022 at 02:49AM by AlfredNotSoGreat https://ift.tt/PKsr1...
When watching videos of people being kind and helping out others, we always think we need more people that are kind, but in reality, we need to BE the kind people
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Submitted February 16, 2022 at 01:43AM by Mutraxation https://ift.tt/6v7pN...
Every bit of energy you use brings the universe slightly closer to its end
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Submitted February 16, 2022 at 12:46AM by QueenElsaArrendelle https://ift.tt/1fNek...
We study world history so that we may not repeat our mistakes and so that we may tell better jokes.
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Submitted February 15, 2022 at 04:50AM by UncleIye https://ift.tt/yzUmb...
You must have an identical twin to see yourself in the way the world sees you
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Submitted February 15, 2022 at 03:42AM by Political_Piper https://ift.tt/GrUes...
Zombies are the only people who will eat your ass
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Submitted February 15, 2022 at 02:50AM by Several_Marzipan3807 https://ift.tt/AlyZz...
Chuck Norris must be able to read the Voynich manuscript.
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Submitted February 15, 2022 at 01:38AM by dee232323 https://ift.tt/ashC6...
laws have so many rules that it becomes a profession to remember it all
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Submitted February 15, 2022 at 12:49AM by Venus_Fly_Trap137 https://ift.tt/ktd1Q...
If you found the perfect hiding spot, you did not find the perfect hiding spot
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 02:49AM by dg327 https://ift.tt/pijCH...
Surgeons are legally allowed to stab people.
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 01:47AM by IgnasBulka https://ift.tt/8SMCm...
People had to draw each and every line on every road in the world.
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:36AM by ThavTheBoringDragon https://ift.tt/eh563...
Most of the dogs from the first Puppy Bowl are dead
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:37AM by invalid_user_taken https://ift.tt/pDdeN...
If humans were mouse-sized, cats would end us.
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:40AM by KENYAD1GGIT https://ift.tt/9nbEH...
the fashion industry dislikes large models because there's a smaller profit margin on larger sized clothes
.....i think
Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:47AM by whydub38 https://ift.tt/Qlmrx...
Mount St. Helens was an inside job.
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Submitted February 14, 2022 at 12:48AM by ZergFromToyStory https://ift.tt/bSYtc...
Lingerie is the clothing version of The Streisand Effect. You really become extra focused on and aware of the body parts that are covered up.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 02:50AM by 2ND_Dinner https://ift.tt/pHyjv...
Having a big heart and having an enlarged heart have vastly different implications.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:38AM by The_Wack_Knight https://ift.tt/UfN9T...
A person with a smaller mouth is probably healthier then a person with a larger mouth because they can't eat as fast.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:41AM by Come_Quickly_Comrade https://ift.tt/or61I...
If you adopt a cat who’s previous owner died, there’s a chance the cat ate a bit of them.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:42AM by Villan_99 https://ift.tt/crpgu...
Коммунизм никогда не сработает, так что просто перестаньте его прославлять.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:48AM by AlbertMendez442 https://ift.tt/nbCPw...
We've probably forgotten several important things while storing memories binge watching TV.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 01:49AM by ActualGrowth1335 https://ift.tt/zjcL5...
If the birthday cutoff for western schools is around September 1st, the cutoff to get pregnant is around Thanksgiving.
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Submitted February 13, 2022 at 12:49AM by TheOneAndOnlyHydra https://ift.tt/Bda1f...
There are fully grown young adults amongst us that have never used Windows XP.
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:44AM by SUbl8987 https://ift.tt/CrJSt...
Animals in cartoons must be jealous of their anthropomorphic counterparts.
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:46AM by ral365 https://ift.tt/QjPtn...
People who wear glasses supposedly look smart, but they ironically had to fail a test to get the glasses
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 03:48AM by Open-Second-5787 https://ift.tt/jd953...
There are more micro organisms in your body than there are people on earth.
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 02:49AM by Yakisobath34 https://ift.tt/JkPaL...
Biblical depictions of angles are creepy because they are supposed to be 4th dimensional beings. When 3D humans get CAT scans, the 2D images look creepy because we are viewing a 3D person in one less dimension.
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 01:47AM by unbecoming_class https://ift.tt/IL2So...
you get stressed because you don’t know what to do, but you don’t know what to do because you are stressed
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Submitted February 12, 2022 at 12:48AM by sajjolH https://ift.tt/Ed6pg...
Bob Saget bumped his head, went to bed and didn’t get up in the morning.
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 02:44AM by searchingtofind25 https://ift.tt/nAX3e...
Freedom is going to be an NFT
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 01:44AM by Inigogoboots https://ift.tt/K54SR...
Someone’s living a third world life in a first world country, and someone else is enjoying a first world life in a third world country.
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:32AM by wormholetrafficjam https://ift.tt/CQ5dm...
Gravity is a potentially infinite source of energg
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:40AM by WyvernKid93 https://ift.tt/l2nj1...
To improve the world there ought to be fewer pedants. Definitely not less pedants, but fewer.
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:40AM by pufballcat https://ift.tt/HF3PZ...
Sitcoms often end with the main characters moving out of their houses so that the crew can get a jump on set striking.
Think about it. Friends, The Nanny, New Girl, Fresh Prince, Golden Girls, I think even How I Met Your Mother, I could go on. It makes sense, tho. It’s a logical reason to be in an empty house, and saves time on striking the set after it ends.
Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:46AM by peaches_1922 https://ift.tt/D3J64...
It is likely, due to natural selection, that at some point in your life, an evolutionary dead end has looked down you, smugly.
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Submitted February 11, 2022 at 12:48AM by ComradeVISIXVI https://ift.tt/BqaYO...
We could all potentially be middle aged and just not know it yet
Who knows when we'll die.
Submitted February 10, 2022 at 04:46AM by TornApartByLisa https://ift.tt/Wx9Vw...
When the younger generations start watching Star Wars they’ll eventually think of Yoda as Old Grogu
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Submitted February 10, 2022 at 03:46AM by ChrisOuzou https://ift.tt/PSYLb...
Toasters need a snooze button to cook for another 30 seconds without forgetting about it.
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Submitted February 10, 2022 at 02:42AM by smileedude https://ift.tt/K4Mom...
Society views teenagers who love or hate the rich as cringe.
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Submitted February 10, 2022 at 01:50AM by Difficult-Point-8665 https://ift.tt/5Q0XS...
If you're chased by a serial killer you're both running for your life
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Submitted February 10, 2022 at 12:47AM by Greysbastard https://ift.tt/s4Vnh...
Life could be much more peaceful if humans could close their ears
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Submitted February 09, 2022 at 04:49AM by bamman527 https://ift.tt/jXl9A...
Going on a snow skiing trip and never actually touching snow is easily doable.
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Submitted February 09, 2022 at 03:46AM by dcdttu https://ift.tt/touQ9...
In Disneys Tangled, all Mother Gothel had to do was lie to Rapunzel about when her birthday was and she might not have been so curious about the floating lanterns and would have stayed in the tower forever.
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Submitted February 09, 2022 at 02:46AM by ObserveTheGreyArea https://ift.tt/mGAX7...
since rat poison works on people too, there's really no need to keep calling it rat poison
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Submitted February 09, 2022 at 01:49AM by CentrePeace https://ift.tt/vBjJP...
Every major company says race does not matter and everyone is equal….but they still require you to put your race on job applications
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Submitted February 09, 2022 at 12:48AM by Cautious_Guess_6026 https://ift.tt/Ydifj...
It only take 2 people at an auction to set the monetary value of an item; and to all other similar items moving forward.
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Submitted February 08, 2022 at 04:49AM by Souskei https://ift.tt/tUMxA...
Prince Phillip died at 99 because he could never keep it 100
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Submitted February 08, 2022 at 03:48AM by GroundbreakingAd7855 https://ift.tt/r5FNb...
The longer you wait to have sex the more embarrassing it will be when the other person realises
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Submitted February 08, 2022 at 02:50AM by JackzGamez2009 https://ift.tt/rlok8...
The planets at the edges of the universe experience night skies with no stars
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Submitted February 08, 2022 at 01:43AM by ErgoNonSim https://ift.tt/58cJB...
You have to get-up, because you fall-asleep
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Submitted February 08, 2022 at 12:39AM by electricdingaling https://ift.tt/WRaAZ...
USB-Sticks, a technology in decline are gaining a revival as crypto currency wallets
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:47AM by onlyforthisjob https://ift.tt/83BI7...
If social networks would use their hyperintelligent algoritms to make us better people we would probably be willing to pay more for using it than advertisers pay for us
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:49AM by medBrain https://ift.tt/9sUbJ...
You are someone's reason to masturbate
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 01:50AM by danclimpertec https://ift.tt/tI4hi...
It is impossible for there to be complete silence. Try it.
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:40AM by Gezoredditing https://ift.tt/DYEWZ...
Think about it, you either have a nappy-poo or a poopy nap. Choose wisely
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:41AM by Circuit-Breaker-13 https://ift.tt/S05Ac...
Wind is earth’s Ninja. You can’t actually see it, it’ll kick your ass and there’s no way to fight back.
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:41AM by Buffalones https://ift.tt/G2wLk...
There is an Office at Microsoft that uses Microsoft Office to send an email to another Office at Microsoft about Microsoft Office.
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:44AM by VincentLecavalier04 https://ift.tt/tKxfM...
A human stands a better chance against a shark on land than a shark stands against a human in the water.
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Submitted February 07, 2022 at 12:49AM by adamantcondition https://ift.tt/GUFhC...
Miami is closer to Havana Cuba than it is to Orlando.
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Submitted February 06, 2022 at 04:49AM by JohnWarosa69420 https://ift.tt/fM1rK...
If humans relocated to another habitable planet outside our solar system, we'd have to rename sunglasses.
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Submitted February 06, 2022 at 03:46AM by Spiderdan https://ift.tt/0UXue...
If someone is engaged in a 'dick-measuring' contest, they must have stiff competition.
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Submitted February 06, 2022 at 02:45AM by Mike_OxonFaier https://ift.tt/adYu5...
Some ideas sound amazing in our head, but when we let them out, we sort of wish we were dead
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Submitted February 06, 2022 at 01:46AM by blitzmeme69 https://ift.tt/Ymlru...
The likelihood of getting a fast food burger that looks like the photograph decreases in direct relation to how close you are to a standard mealtime.
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Submitted February 06, 2022 at 12:39AM by SoupIsAHotSmoothie https://ift.tt/zOeLd...
Interviews is all about telling a story and making them believe in that.
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Submitted February 05, 2022 at 04:50AM by xpiercedangelx https://ift.tt/tkdDB...
The Xbox logo contains half of the standard buttons on a Playstation controller.
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Submitted February 05, 2022 at 03:48AM by MaroonTrucker28 https://ift.tt/gNLGB...
If a particular word is offensive and a replacement word is used as substitute, eventually the replacement word becomes the new offensive word. The cycle continues in perpetuity.
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Submitted February 05, 2022 at 02:49AM by IronHe https://ift.tt/uh0qx...
Every second that passes is a second that we will never get back
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Submitted February 05, 2022 at 01:49AM by Xxcringy-usernamexX https://ift.tt/GvIW3...
All worms are earth worms.
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Submitted February 05, 2022 at 12:48AM by Charlesox https://ift.tt/0Nasc...
Going to Pizza Express in Woking is a very unusual thing for one to do
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 02:48AM by Spare-Percentage2566 https://ift.tt/Bb3o7...
If signatures were required on all delivered packages, porch pirates wouldn't be a thing
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:38AM by Inauspiciouscrow https://ift.tt/Auxav...
A survival knife can also be an anti-survival knife
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:40AM by Fuck_Fucker_Fuckest_ https://ift.tt/dPrN1...
Ever human that has ever lived has traveled at the same fastest speed
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by moneybot13 https://ift.tt/uCGfr...
There is no one to close the door when the bus driver gets off
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by Espe0nUmbre0n https://ift.tt/6FjTk...
With the rise of online banking, the burglary industry is going to take a major hit
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 01:47AM by my_choice_was_taken https://ift.tt/jLnty...
Dragons are to dinosaurs what the devil is to humans: fire breath, horns, wings, and higher malicious intelligence
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Submitted February 04, 2022 at 12:42AM by GoatsWithWigs https://ift.tt/RCuZrYW...
Anything can become a melee weapon, like a slice of pizza.
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Submitted February 03, 2022 at 04:48AM by ShadowKirbo https://ift.tt/ZAP8Vz6...
There are cabinets in houses, but no housets in cabins.
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Submitted February 03, 2022 at 03:48AM by indiequick https://ift.tt/dkbST9q...
As individuals & as a society, what we do know often holds us back more than what we don’t know.
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Submitted February 03, 2022 at 02:49AM by Turbulent-Specific39 https://ift.tt/mza0qwG...
Dogs with homeless people are probably stolen
Human societies won't adopt out to homeless people, Breeders usually charge large fees that homeless can't afford, and strays are usually picked up quick by public agencies.
Submitted February 03, 2022 at 01:48AM by PNWgriz https://ift.tt/4Vn0B32...
The hardest thing about being dumb is people treating as dumb, and being right.
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Submitted February 03, 2022 at 12:48AM by echo_zoo https://ift.tt/KkeGCcy...
Men who like to be pegged by their girlfriends are probably not completely honest about their own sexuality with themselves
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Submitted February 02, 2022 at 04:49AM by Reddit_Ghost2021 https://ift.tt/e8NYc3j...
if you’ve noticed your electric toothbrush’s battery lasting longer than usual, you probably haven’t been brushing long enough lately.
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Submitted February 02, 2022 at 03:38AM by eatmorecake99 https://ift.tt/wsvWmbc...
When breaking up - it’s much easier to irrationally hate the other than it is to rationalize the root cause of diversion
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Submitted February 02, 2022 at 02:48AM by longtommy02 https://ift.tt/upIo8i9...
The next generation will not know school closures like we did because they will be on zoom instead of having the entire day off.
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Submitted February 02, 2022 at 01:43AM by Armaan204 https://ift.tt/kTS8XWH...
Email is the original DM.
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Submitted February 02, 2022 at 12:48AM by somethinggoeshere11 https://ift.tt/YkhiqjO...